Wednesday, September 28, 2011

lucky.

Here's the thing. I feel so unbelievably lucky to be able to BE a Stay-At-Home-Mom for our daughter in this day and age.

I was actually out tonight at 6pm (I know, not late...but in our house where our toddler normally is asleep by 5:30pm and we're in lock down, it felt late for me...) driving home with our baby in her carseat, and I noticed a parent picking up his toddler at 5:58pm from a local daycare.

All I could think about was the amazing day I had with our daughter today and if I were in the same position, I would have dropped her off before 9am and picked her up at 6pm. Missing a lot of today with her. I realize that some parents need to do this. Some parents have to do this. Some parents want to do this. Some parents just do it.

I'm not saying it's good or bad, I'm just saying.

Our daughter is a toddler which translated means "some days aren't easy", but I love what I'm able to do. I love being the person who understands her babble the best, her unique sign language words, her cries. Sometimes I feel like I'm in the toddler bubble and I want/need/must have grown-up interaction along side of a good glass of wine or two, but most of the time, it's all good. It just feels right for me.

Just lucky.

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Loves start so early.

All my life I've been drawn to certain things...Peter pan collars. Puff sleeves. Pugs. NYC.

Little did I know that a lot of my "loves" came from my favorite book growing up - Eloise.

My Grandmother, who I called Omi, had lived in NYC. She told me stories of living in the big city, shopping, taking 'fashion' pictures with her beautiful sisters on 'tar beach' (rooftop of their apartment building), and I related all of this to this book.

Here was this little girl character, who was basically raised by her Nanny - and lived in the Plaza. She had an imagination that I adored, a pug, a turtle, life with grown ups...I thought she was fantastic.

While I was living in NYC in my 20s, I had the chance to meet the Illustrator, Hilary Knight, who (cough cough) I had always thought was female at B&N on the Upper East side for a book signing. (Okay, this was pre-Google....yes, I could have researched Hilary a bit more in the library..but..I didn't.)

It's funny - from 1-30 years old, I didn't think much about what I loved, I just did. I just loved certain things so much and went with it. Now at 40, I realize how much these little, important moments followed me through so much of my life and still do.

And I wonder what our daughter will bring with her along the journey....A Mom who makes up funny songs to anything that buzzes? Rain and spiders and mountains which exist in plenty here in the Northwest? A Daddy who loves Chocolate milk as much as she does? Hmmmmmmmm - Love starts so early.

Shoes.

We have a 20 - almost 21 month old - baby girl who (cough cough) has more shoes than I do. I used to be that woman who purchased a new outfit, new accessory, new ____, weekly - but no longer. Now it's my daughter. My daughter who owns the cutest shoes ever, but ... ONLY WEARS her rain boots. Forget if it's raining or not, she ONLY wants to wear her "BOOOOOTS."

Don't get me wrong, she looks fabulous, but some outfits would look cuter with a pair of See Kai Run mary janes or sandals or....

No, I'm not that Mom. I'm just a Mom who used to be more of a slave to fashion and now wears hoodies and jeans and dresses her daughter up for occasions like music class, play dates, or gymnastics.

Now where are my Hunter boots? High Gloss please.