Friday, April 25, 2014

Party of 3.

Is she your only one? Are you planning on having another? Is she your youngest?

Our girl is it. We have one. Party of one child in this house.

Was that the plan? No.

"Mommy, why do some people try to have a baby and they just don't get one? Mommy- is it like when I ask Santa for many different things and I don't get everything?" 

M asked me this just the other day.

No one knows your journey. No one knows how scared and excited you were the first time and how the excitement ended too fast.

No one knows how scared we were with you and how we thought we lost you too, but didn't. And are so thankful every day.

No one knows that you could've been an older sister.

But I've found that everything I've asked for in life never comes the way I expected it. It comes to me in a different shape, a different time than I expected, and in a totally different way that I could ever imagine (I.E. Me living in the PNW?!)

Party of 3 is actually pretty awesome and intimate. Party of three is pretty special. Do I crave siblings for our girl? Of course, but that journey is over for us. Is it easy for me to close that door? Never - but it's not bad either if that makes sense. It's bittersweet.

I see so many of M's friends as her family and I hope they will be forever. These two boys pictured here are so dear to our girl. And secretly (okay, not so secretly) I'd adore to have them as sons. They are the sweetest, caring boys ever - and treat our girl so kindly it makes my heart sing.

Family is defined so differently for all of us. We're creating our family of 3 plus 100 more family members. Here's to all of us together.

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